Thursday, October 27, 2005

You can build a new life

No matter how far you have gone on the wrong road, turn back.
- Turkish proverb

Most of us face situations where we realize that the course we have chosen for ourselves or our family was wrong, a lost cause. Yet we stick to our original course, believing that if we try harder it might just work out, if we are more forgiving our spouse might become more compatible, if we make more sacrifices others might be happier.

It doesn't, they don't, they aren't. No matter how long we stick at the wrong course for our lives, it remains the wrong course and we will never reach a satisfiable goal by continuing on that course.

It's extremely hard to quit one course of life, pretend it didn't happen, then launch into a new one. Yet eventually, that is what must happen. No amount of postponement makes the change any better or less tragic. No matter how long we delay making the final change, feelings will get hurt just as bad, maybe worse. Continuing makes everyone suffer.

Sometimes the only way to fix a house that was built badly is to tear it down and begin again. So it is with our lives. Sometimes we have to begin again with a fresh start.

But, like the house builder who built a bad one and learned from his mistakes, we have our experience to carry with us into our new lives. We know what we had and we know we should avoid getting into the same traps.

Building a new life is the biggest challenge most of us ever face. But the results are worth the price.

Bill Allin
'Turning It Around: Causes and Cures for Today's Epidemic Social Problems,' striving to help people cut the cord and launch into a new life when it's the only viable way to continue.
Learn more at

No comments: